This is a little something that I wrote in my mini notebook one night after being out with friends. I forgot to scan it, but it due time, it will be posted. Here's the actual text of what I wrote in the notebook:

4.26.04
I question my maturity sometimes. What makes it even worse it that I'm questioning it at 4:30 am Monday. I look at the people that I grew up with - even the ones I lost contact w/ and just been seeing them recently (just running into them & what not). I look @ everyone else around me and feel like they look their age. Not necessairly act it all the time (kids @ heart, no insults). I'm 21, feeling 16 and look 18, 19 on a good day. The logic is all screwed up on that one. Maybe its just the insomnia & insecurities speaking right now but I feel naive & gullable about life, and I'm about 2B 22 in 2 months. [It's too early/too late to ponder such deep thoughts.] It has a lot 2 do w/ my upbringing. Quite diciplined & structured to the point of asking if it was necessary. I was a good child. Parents were just overprotective. Maybe a bit too much. So when I finally became of age 2 do a couple things, I felt like I was lookin @ the word with a pair of fresh eyes: Perspective was altered immediately (kinda). Maybe not that instantly but it changed. There's something profound that I want 2 say, but that's out the window now. It's 4:40 am. It's hard 2B profound this late @nite/ this early in the AM. Maybe I can sleep better after writing this down. Lets hope so.

End: 4:41am